Questioning Pain

We learn at an early age that pain means something is wrong.  That pain is indicative of an infection, an injury, or an illness.  That it's something that is fixable with an aspirin, antibiotic, a bandage, a doctor's visit, or a cast.  That the doctor could feel the heat radiating from the sprain, see the muscle tear on the MRI, the fracture on the X-ray, or diagnose painful strep throat from the swab.  We're told that it hurts now, but it will feel better.

My Body is a Wonderland

When I was diagnosed with gastroparesis, my gastroenterologist told me that I may never get better and recommended that I take a medication to help my stomach function.  The first recommendation was an antibiotic with every meal.  I didn’t want to do this, so she then recommended taking Reglan, a medication that hospitalized my maternal grandmother for weeks.  She and I have had parallel reactions to several medications, so I was wary of trying it.  Her last try was a non FDA approved medication that would have to be made a compound pharmacy, and not covered by insurance.  Now, I know the FDA is far from perfect, and that there are a lot of medications that are not approved here but are in Europe, but my fear was what if this drug worked?  I’d then be stuck paying completely out of pocket for who knows how long...and so I declined again.   I told her I read that it could be controlled by diet, and I’d like to try that first.  After this appointment I called the nurse, not sure if I was supposed to make a follow-up appointment.  Apparently, since I refused medications, the doctor didn’t need to see me again.

Am I in Control of My Body?

Compared to many, my chronic health issues are almost embarrassingly in check. I take my meds. I try to keep to a sleep schedule. I’m not regularly in substantial amounts of pain, and in fact have good days where pain isn’t a factor at all. I’m able to hold a well paid full time job with great benefits.  I miss maybe one day a year due to actual chronic illness related concerns. I know, compared to many, I am very, very lucky.